Roommates and sex are two things that don’t go hand in hand. When you’re living in a small apartment and are living next door to, or worse — in the same room as your roommate, having sex can be difficult.
If you’re close with your roommate, you have the advantage of being able to talk about boundaries to feel comfortable, but if you’re not close with your roommate, the conversation can be awkward. Regardless of what your roommate situation is, it’s essential to be respectful and establish sex boundaries. Here are some do’s and don’ts of navigating having sex in a shared apartment:
1. Set ground rules
Setting rules for when you can and can’t have sex in the apartment is going to be an awkward conversation regardless of your relationship with your roommate. If a problem never comes up, you can try to keep doing what you’re doing. But more likely, someone will walk in on someone having sex, so it’s better to play it safe and set some ground rules.
2. Make a schedule
Regardless of whether you share a room or not, having sex when your roommate isn’t home is ideal. Most people get into some routine, so discuss your schedule with your roommate, so you know when they’re going to be home and when they’re not, so you don’t have them accidentally walk in on you.
3. Communication is key
As with any good relationship, communication is critical. Even if sex is an uncomfortable topic for you to discuss with your roommate, it’s better to get it over with than risk having any mishaps. Being honest and communicating if something makes you uncomfortable is vital because your roommate can’t just read your mind. Just suck it up and tell them how you feel!
4. Be respectful
Bottom line, you have to be respectful. Even if you’ve been best friends with your roommate for ten years and feel comfortable talking about anything, people can still feel easily disrespected. Don’t overstep boundaries, even if you think you don’t need them with your roommate.